The Wedding Planning Advice I Give Every Couple Before Their Big Day

Brooke Elward

Sep 1

6 min read

Wedding planning can get overwhelming very quickly. There are timelines, vendors, family members, travel, photography, reception events, and about a million little details to keep track of.

After photographing weddings across Michigan, I've learned that the things that make the biggest difference aren't always the things couples spend the most time thinking about.

A few simple decisions before your wedding can make the actual day feel much more relaxed. These are some of the pieces of wedding planning advice I give my couples before their big day.

Build a Realistic Wedding Timeline

Your timeline doesn't need to account for every single second of the day, but it should give you enough time to actually enjoy it.

Start with your ceremony time and work backward from there. Think about getting ready, first looks, family photos, wedding party photos, couple portraits, travel, and anything else that needs to happen before the ceremony.

After the ceremony, think about where everyone needs to go next. Are you taking family photos? Greeting guests? Signing your marriage license? Going straight to the reception?

The biggest thing I recommend is leaving some buffer time.

Wedding days rarely go exactly according to schedule. Hair and makeup might take longer than expected, someone might forget something in the hotel room, or traffic might slow everyone down. Having 10 or 15 extra minutes between major events can keep one small delay from turning into a stressful afternoon.

If you're building your timeline and aren't sure how much time to allow for photos, travel, or family portraits, ask your photographer. This is something we can help you work through before the wedding day.

Prepare a Wedding Detail Box

Your wedding details are a huge part of telling the story of your day.

Instead of having me search the entire getting-ready room for your rings, invitation, shoes, jewelry, perfume, vow books, and other details, put everything together in one box or bag before I arrive.

This saves time and makes it much easier for me to photograph everything together.

I also recommend including sentimental items you might want photographed. Something doesn't have to be traditionally "wedding" to be meaningful.

If you're not sure what to include, I have a full guide on Things Every Couple Should Give Their Wedding Photographer that goes into much more detail.

Create Your Family Photo List Before the Wedding

Family photos are much easier when we know exactly what we're photographing before the wedding day.

Make a list of the family combinations you want, including parents, siblings, grandparents, and any other relatives who are important to you.

If your parents are divorced or you have complicated family dynamics, that's completely fine. Just let me know ahead of time so we can create a list that makes everyone comfortable.

I also recommend choosing a family wrangler from each side. Their job is to find the next group of people while we're photographing the current one.

You don't want to spend your wedding day yelling across the venue looking for Uncle Bob.

Plan Your Travel Time

Travel time is about more than the time it takes to drive somewhere.

If you're leaving your hotel for portraits, everyone needs to get into the cars, load their belongings, find parking, and walk to the photo location.

Give yourself more time than Google Maps tells you.

This is especially important if you're getting married somewhere you're not familiar with. If you don't live in the city where you're getting married, I also recommend arriving the day before whenever possible. You don't want your wedding morning to depend on traffic being perfect.

Decide Whether You Want a First Look

There isn't a right or wrong answer when it comes to a first look.

Some couples love having a private moment together before the ceremony. It can help calm nerves, give you more time for portraits, and allow you to spend more of your cocktail hour with guests.

Other couples really want to see each other for the first time walking down the aisle.

Both options can be emotional and beautiful.

The important thing is to choose what feels right for you instead of choosing based on what you think you're "supposed" to do.

You can also have first looks with your parents, grandparents, siblings, or other important people in your life. These can be some of the most emotional moments of the day.

Keep Your Reception Events Flowing

Your reception doesn't have to stop every twenty minutes for another scheduled event.

One thing I often recommend is grouping some of your reception traditions together.

For example, you could have your grand entrance, go directly into your first dance, and then cut your cake before dinner. Once those events are finished, your guests can eat and enjoy the rest of the evening without frequent interruptions.

If you're planning a receiving line, think about whether it's really the best use of your time. A receiving line can take much longer than couples expect. Visiting tables during dinner or taking a photo with every table can be a more relaxed alternative.

And don't feel like you have to include every wedding tradition you've ever seen. Keep the ones that mean something to you and skip the ones that don't.

Eat and Stay Hydrated

Please eat. Seriously.

Your wedding day is going to be long, and you don't want to make it through the morning on coffee and adrenaline.

Have breakfast while you're getting ready. Keep snacks nearby. Drink water throughout the day. If you know you'll have a long stretch between getting ready and dinner, plan accordingly.

You have spent months planning this day. You should actually feel good enough to enjoy it.

Give Other People Jobs

You do not need to be responsible for everything on your wedding day.

Give your bridal party and family members specific jobs before the wedding.

Someone can keep track of the rings. Someone can gather family members for photos. Someone can make sure the bouquets are ready. Someone can hold onto your phone.

The goal is to make sure you aren't the person everyone comes to when something needs to be done.

And whenever possible, don't ask your family or bridal party to spend the morning setting up your wedding. Let them get ready with you and enjoy the day. Give setup responsibilities to your venue, coordinator, decorator, or another person who isn't supposed to be celebrating alongside you.

Be Prepared for Something to Go Wrong

Something might go wrong.

A boutonniere could fall off. Someone could spill something on their clothes. A vendor could run late. It could rain. Someone could forget their shoes.

That's wedding life.

The goal isn't to prevent every possible problem. It's to have a plan for the little things and people around you who can handle them without involving you.

This is why I recommend having an emergency bag with things like safety pins, bobby pins, a Tide Pen, fashion tape, medicine, chargers, tissues, and other small essentials.

You might never use most of it. But when someone needs it, you'll be very glad it's there.

Trust Your Vendors

You hired your vendors because you trusted them to do their jobs.

Let them.

Your photographer knows how to organize family photos. Your DJ knows how to keep the reception moving. Your coordinator knows how to handle the timeline. Your venue knows how to handle the space.

If something unexpected happens, let your vendors work together to solve it.

You don't need to personally fix every problem that happens on your wedding day.

Talk to Your Photographer Before the Wedding

Don't wait until the wedding day to ask questions.

If you're unsure about your timeline, family photos, first look, ceremony exit, reception schedule, portrait locations, or anything else photography-related, ask me ahead of time.

I'd much rather talk through a potential problem weeks before your wedding than try to solve it while you're getting ready.

Your photographer should be more than someone who shows up with a camera. We spend a large part of the day with you, and we're often in a good position to help you think through how everything will flow.

Most Importantly, Enjoy Your Wedding

This is the advice I want you to remember the most.

Your wedding day is going to go by incredibly fast.

At some point, you're going to realize that the ceremony is over. Dinner has happened. The dance floor is packed. Your photographer is telling you there are only a few minutes left before the reception ends.

Try to stop and take it in.

Look around the room.

Notice the people who traveled to be there.

Dance with your friends.

Hug your family.

Eat the cake.

Laugh when something doesn't go according to plan.

The little things that don't go perfectly will probably become some of your favorite stories later.

Your wedding doesn't have to be perfect to be an amazing day.

Final Thoughts

Good wedding planning isn't about controlling every second.

It's about preparing enough ahead of time that you have room to enjoy whatever happens.

Build a realistic timeline. Leave yourself buffers. Prepare your details. Plan your family photos. Give other people jobs. Eat something. Drink water. Trust the vendors you've hired.

Then, when the day finally arrives, let yourself be there.

You only get one wedding day. Don't spend it worrying about whether everything is going according to plan.

Enjoy it.

Planning Your Wedding?

Every couple who books with me receives my wedding welcome guide with planning tips, timeline advice, photography information, and recommendations to help make the day run smoothly. If you have questions while you're planning, I'm always happy to talk through them with you before the wedding day.